A customer and his two kids walk up to the register carrying a few items, one of which was an umbrella, something I've never seen bought because because A) I work in the electronics section and 2) We live in the middle of a desert. I was able to ring up the regular items up as normal but the umbrella lacked a UPC, most likely taken off by an unattended child, just like how life has taken what little hope I had at a respectable job and giving me something that lends less respect than prostitution. A child who was no doubt conceived when their parents had 5 drinks too many and forgot the BC and just decided to roll with it because "Hey, we already raise a gold fish, how much harder could a human life be?" completely oblivious to the fact that their gold fish died from neglect while they were in a drunken stupor. Anyway, where was I? Oh right, couldn't ring up the umbrella.
"F**k the umbrella, I'm in a hurry." The dad barked.
So, I finished the transaction and put the umbrella away.
"No umbrella, daddy?" his daughter asked with puppy dog eyes.
"No, the man is being difficult, honey!"
Being difficult? Nah, being difficult is me tripping you and slamming your head against the counter, knocking you out. Then I'll press my foot on your neck, slowly cutting off oxygen from your unconscious body and when your daughter asks why I'm beating up her daddy I'll bend down and whisper to her "Because he's being difficult, honey."
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